Sep 2 2011
Mike Pelfrey Is Awesome At Licking…But He SUCKS At Pitching
In the Major League Baseball rulebook, rule 8.02 states: The pitcher shall not- “(a) (1) Bring his pitching hand in contact with his mouth or lips while in the 18 foot circle surrounding the pitching rubber.” luckily (or unlucky) for New York Mets awful starting pitcher Mike Pelfrey, one can stand at 18.1 ft away, and lick the SHIT out of his hand.
Not only has Pelfrey mastered the art of licking….he also is the king of sucking. With a career record of 50-52 and an ERA of 4.38 (this season he is 7-11 with a 4.65 ERA), he officially licks his hands more times in ONE GAME then he has wins in his career. In fact it’s damn near close to double.
According to the NY Times, (yes they REALLY had someone sit there and count the number of times Pelfrey sticks his big ass hand in his mouth) Mike Pelfrey licked his right hand a whopping 89 times over his six-plus innings of work in his last start on Tuesday.
Pelfrey claims he licks his hands on occasion to get a better grip on the baseball. I call bullshit. If you watch the Mets (consider yourself lucky if you don’t) you KNOW the second Pelfrey goes to his mouth, it’s time to get him out of the game. Now the licking isn’t the only warning sign that Pelfrey is about to implode… if the Big-stature, little-gutted Pelfrey is tugging at his hat, jersey, and profusely wiping the sweat of his forehead…get cha popcorn out…
The MLB is a bunch of nazi’s when it comes to allowing you to share videos, but I found a brief one of some creepy kid videoing pitchers mechanics (DON’T COPY PELFREY’S MECHANICS BTW) and you can catch him getting two licks in, during a short :38 second clip. As a Met fan, I hope his next 3 starts are his last 3 as a Met, EVER. We have enough weak minded dopes running the organization, why have your so called “ACE of the staff” be another one of them?
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6__XivqVbqc&feature=related[/youtube]